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The Impossible Yearning

“Let each man follow his own path. If he sincerely and ardently wishes to know God, peace be unto him! He will surely realize Him.”

Sri Ramakrishna


I am comforted and encouraged by the first part of Sri Ramakrishna’s statement. My path, which to me doesn’t seem that unique or strange now, is certainly outside the bounds of what was acceptable in the religious context in which I grew up, and may perhaps still seem strange to many who profess faith in Christianity, particularly in this part of the country. I am continually grateful to have the loving words of great masters like Ramakrishna, Swami Ramdas and my own teacher, Eknath Easwaran, to remind me that there are indeed many paths to God. What is less comforting is the second part of the statement, that one must “sincerely and ardently” desire union with God in order to reach the goal. Despite my strong and increasing commitment to spiritual practice and inner growth, I confess I still lack the deep and all-encompassing yearning for complete liberation. It’s too frightening a prospect to my ego. And it should be. Total liberation, according to the teachers mentioned above (and many, many others) means simply and precisely the death of the ego.

How can I wish the death of that with which I am still so strongly identified? I can’t. I must have God’s grace and mercy for such an impossible task.
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